Pak Mail Changes Direction


Packing and shipping stalwart Pak Mail Centers of America has decided to ramp up its marketing and advertising efforts by hiring a celebrity spokesperson. After mulling over dozens of options, the company decided to hire arcade video game legend Pac-Man.

“We just felt it was the most logical option,” said marketing coordinator Seth Sinclair. “Who doesn’t love Pac-Man? We want to pick up a larger demographic of customers. There’s no more timeless celebrity than Pac-Man.”

According to Franchise Sales Director Chris Davenport, the ghosts from the Pac-Man game will represent its competitors.

“We want to show how efficient Pak Mail is,” Davenport said. “I mean, have you ever met anyone more efficient than Pac-Man? I know I haven’t.”

Pak Mail will use its new spokesperson in a variety of ways. He will be featured in television commercials and internet ads. They are also developing a mobile Pac-Man game where he is wearing a Pak Mail uniform while eating the pac-dots and chomping up the competition. As a caveat, every store across the world will be furnished with a brand new Pac-Man arcade game completely customized and branded in full Pak Mail gear.

There will be some changes that the company had to agree to for the contract to be accepted. The business will eliminate the ‘k’ in its name and just be Pac-Mail. Moreover, the company slogan will be changed from “Pack it, Ship it, Crate it, Freight it” to simply “Pac It.”

Training coordinator Kevin Green and field consultant Mike Jaroch both believe the changes are necessary to push the brand.

“Look, this isn’t Pong or Frogger. It’s Pac-Man” Green said. “It’s not every day you get a chance to work with a legend.”
“You honestly can’t tell me you’ve ever walked by a Pac-Man game and not played,” Jaroch added.

The decision has been hit with some skepticism. Business experts don’t see the benefit of using a video game character as a spokesperson for a packing and shipping company.

CEO Alex Zai could not be reached for comment as he was out of town on business at the time of the decision.

The Pak Mail ISC office had one united message about the changes: April Fools!

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